I don’t know what this post will have to do with Samurai Swords, yet I assure you I will try to work it in at some point. I mean, duh, they’re cool as shit. And Japanese and that’s where the Oakland A’s play today and tonight. Japan. It’s 9:04pm on the West Coast and they are in the 3rd inning of a 2nd game, currently losing 7-0 to the Hanshin Tigers, the same team who beat the Seattle Mariners yesterday.
Earlier today the A’s defeated the Yomiuri Giants. The Giants and the Tigers, two classic names for some Japanese baseball teams. They could have at least went with the Samurai Swords. See, told you I’d get it in there. And it’s 9:12pm. Didn’t even take me 8 minutes. 8 minutes seems like a lot of time to write a paragraph. I must not be very good at this writing thing. Why am I telling you my thoughts? Damn. And normally I’m so much more confident than this. I wonder if the Japanese fans have seen Moneyball with Brad Pitt? How would Moneyball translate in Japanese? I bet it’s Yenball. Who do you think would win this fight: Yenball or samaurai sword?
Kurt Suzuki for the A’s, can I get a home run, playa? In Japan. Way to get it done against the home county. Yes, I know he’s from Hawaii. But his name is Kurt Kiyoshi Suzuki, I’m assuming he’s got Japanese ancestors somewhere in the family line. Maybe not. Either way.
Now, I know Ichiro Suzuki is from Japan. And he went 1/4 against his native land. Really Ich, that’s the best you can do? The fans were there to see you.
Ooh, upon (not to be mistaken for Ippon) researching Samurai swords, I came across this little slice of info for you. The katana (刀) is one of the traditional Japanese swords (日本刀 nihonto) worn by the samurai class of feudal Japan, also commonly referred to as a “samurai sword”. That is taken right from Wikipedia, so if it’s incorrect, blame them.
As a side note, remember Kitana from Mortal Kombat? Man, she was a hottie. Not that I’m into judging how attractive computer generated females may or may not be. I’m just saying, if I was into that kind of thing, I might find her attractive. In that kick my ass, stilleto boot, fan with razor sharp blades, kind of way.
You know what I’m talking about.
This was supposed to go live next week on my main site, WestSideCulture.com, but I gotta say, I’m feeling the love here on the MLB blog network. So, I offer you, an exclusive, full-access preview of my…. preview (doh!)… Just read about the A’s already.
I don’t know why, but I believe. Maybe it’s David Justice or Tim Hudson. Perhaps its Scott Hatteberg or reliever Chad Bradford. Whatever it is, the Oakland A’s have it. GM Brad Pitt and special assistant to baseball operations, Jonah Hill have manipulated this roster to perfection.
OK, enough with the make believe, Hollywood script. This team is not good. The only thing that might be able to save it would be to hire Brad Pitt to do their marketing and ask him to take a large percent stake in the team. Aside from that, the battle of last place in the AL West is on. It’s going to be neck and neck, down to the wire between Seattle and Oakland.
There are a few bright spots we will highlight, but make no mistake about it, this team won’t be contending anytime soon.
Josh Reddick comes over from Boston after playing a solid half season where he came up with many clutch hits for the Red Sox. Jemile Weeks is the best player on the team and will be a Major League All-Star in no time. That about covers the offense.
As far as pitchers go, as always, Oakland is stock piling arms. Dallas Braden will be back after missing 99% of last season. He will lead a staff that’s likely to feature two future aces in Jarrod Parker and Brad Peacock. Both were ranked in baseball’s top prospects, with Parker at #23 on the list.
Oakland does have 6 of the top 100 prospects in all of baseball. GM
Brad Pitt Billy Beane is smart enough to realize the A’s aren’t going to win in Oakland or that dump they call the Coliseum. He’s chosen to invest in the future with commodities of young raw talent. Talent, that hopefully will mature when it’s time for the A’s to move into what likely will be a new home in San Jose.